:: Article

3:AM Brasil: Welcome to Needland

By Xico Sá.

The brave females banished from the paradise by a misogyny god had established a kingdom with nothing magic about it.

They called this pueblo by the name of Needland.

Although it was created by women, in the time where it only existed the fire and the verb, it was the males who had imposed themselves, many centuries later, as the most legitimate Needish citizens.

Be concerned, fragile! They are lost, wether they metrosexuals, übersexuals or secondhandsexuals [those that only wear clothes from second-hand stores]. Weak, cannot take the toughness of the fearless women. The ones that burp masculinity in the pubs, but as soon as they put their legs inside the house, they howl to the last quarter of the moon and they dream on a rain of leashes.

The Needish male doesn’t spend half hour lonely, he doesn’t even go through the loving mourn of she, who landed a sandal right in the middle of his rear – the soft and life-size arse that had already prescribed the kick. He goes around and grasps the first one who walks in front of him, even if it is a plaster mannequin, as occurred to my friend Sizenando, the same one who worked as prime-cheated in the Rubem Braga’s chronicles. While the mannequin was led from one side to the other of the street, for an change of shop-windows, he threw himself at a blond plaster cast and fills it with sperm until these days.

Welcome to the kingdom of the Needland, this inevitable gulf of existence.

Yes, to Needland nobody comes to sightseeing and the tourism is forbidden. The Needland is a kind of Mali, Niger, Burkina Faso, Guinea Bissau, Chade… of the soul.

The Needland is the valley of the Metaphysical Jequitinhonha that sounds like catarrh in our lungs and thorax – Say 33!

Needland doesn’t even have a holiday. A populist and electoral program of public health has now brought to this kingdom Prozac, Lexotan, Frontal and zillions of medicines that act of brain chemicals. The tablets had been put in the Needland’s water net … Added to the salt, to the sugar… yet there wasn’t one single smile, not even of the Alice’s LSDed cat.

Xico Sá – journalist and writer, worked in the main media outlets in Brazil and obtained several awards on his reportages, among them the Esso Award, the Folha de S.Paulo Award and the Abril Award. He writes a column to the newspaper Folha de S.Paulo and he has a chronicle weekly published in the newspapers Diário de Pernambuco, Diário do Nordeste (Fortaleza) and O Tempo (Belo Horizonte). He collaborates to several media, such as Trip Magazine, TPM and Rolling Stone Magazine. He is also on the team of the program Cartão Verde, on Cultura/SP TV . He published the following books: Modos de macho & Modinhas de fêmea (ed. Record, 3ª edição), Divina Comédia da Fama (ed. Objetiva), Nova Geografia da Fome (reportage-book, ed. Tempo d´Imagem), Catecismo de Devoções, Intimidades & Pornografias (Editora do Bispo), Se um cão vadio aos pés de uma mulher-abismo (Ed Fina Flor), Caballeros Solitários Rumo ao Sol Poente (editora do Bispo) e Tripa de Cadela & outras fábulas bêbadas (editora Dulcinéia Catadora) among others.

He is in musical partnership with the band Mundo Livre S/A and took part in the group and as screenwriter for the movie Deserto Feliz (2007), winner of the Gramado (2007) and Guadalajara (2008) festivals, directed by Paulo Caldas.

First published in 3:AM Magazine: Sunday, April 26th, 2009.