:: Fiction

The Land of the Soil published 04/03/2017

The cafeteria lady brought us two glasses of orange liquid and one glass bowl of the same stuff, presumably for the cat. I looked at her in disbelief and asked if we could please have water for the cat. The lady shook her head and barked “No water here. Only soda”.

To my surprise Martha immediately jumped on the table and started drinking the orange stuff. Next I tried it and almost spat it out.

“What the hell is this?”
“Chicken flavored soda,” replied the lady, not even smiling at the ridiculous sentence.

New fiction by Katya Luca.

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The Oddity published 26/02/2017

“Meej, what’s with the hunting cap, you going hunting?”

“Hunting assholes. This place is thick with them.”

“Kind of like shooting fish in a barrel, though.”

“It’s not for sport, EJ, gotta cull the herd of losers.”

“Well… good luck I guess.”

“Thanks bro.”

Chapter 18 of EJ Spode‘s novel The Oddity.

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The Oddity published 19/02/2017

Tom: Chocolate donuts
Drake: ….Chocolate donuts
Bruce: ……..Chocolate donuts. It’s true.

“You mean like chocolate covered? Or chocolate cake donuts.”

Tom: Chocolate covered
Drake: ……………cake
Bruce:…………….Chocolate … both probably

Chapter 17 of EJ Spode‘s novel The Oddity.

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Unspeakable Stop-overs published 14/02/2017

‘We greet our elders where they’ve waited all year for us, sitting black and white on the shelf, and at first they make us pay our distance, their deep cold frowns as unmoveable as if they’d been set in concrete. But the mood – the mood then is of full, incorruptible glee, and sometimes it seems like the rosy peach flowers the houses are filled with are the divine, physical manifestation of this, a bloom fertilised by the national bliss.’

By Armel Dagorn.

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The Oddity published 13/02/2017

They are sisters, and their names are Juno, Saturnia, and Titania.”

“Are you fucking with me?”

“Dude I didn’t name them.”

“They are all named after rockets.”

“They are?”

“Yep. A Juno rocket launched the first US satellite into space. Titan is a warhead launcher. And Saturn V was the Apollo program rocket.”

Chapter 16 of EJ Spode‘s novel The Oddity.

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The Fifth Wall by Rachel Nagelberg – An Excerpt published 06/02/2017

“The becoming of human,” I read aloud, “—unlike all other images or fakes, runs via a culture of total control. This strange
desire, marooned in the abysmal darkness of this city—I am nothing, you are nothing. This is something we understand. This is our only armor.” I look up from the screen. “The Oracle’s having a good day.”

By Rachel Nagelberg.

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The Oddity published 05/02/2017

Dimebag started: “EJ, listen to this!”

“No, I wanna tell him.”

“Why do you get to tell him?”

“Cuz man, we bros.”

“Fuck that, man, he’s my bro too.”

“Yah but we be BROs!”

“That’s the same fucking thing, Climax. Bros are bros; there’s no such thing as bros and BROs. That’s the first fucking rule of bros.”

Chapter 15 of EJ Spode‘s novel The Oddity.

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Taint published 31/01/2017

Loo, I should have said. Just act like you belong, my mother told me when we slipped into sideshow tents or movies without paying. If you can’t look like you belong, pretend you’ve lost your way.

By Jean Kane.

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The Oddity published 29/01/2017

“Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. Fuckety fuck fuck shit. Shit. Fuck… my…life. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. Fuck. Fuck… shit. Shit shit shit. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck two three four fuck two three four. Fuck. Jesus fuck shit. Shit. Shit shit fuck. Fucking fuck fuck shit. Shit. Shit fuck. Fuck me fuck me fuck me fuck me. Fuck… Fuck. Just fuck me. SHIIIIIIIT. fuck… fuck…fuck. Fuck two three four five six seven eight FUCK! FUUUUUUUUCK! Fuck. Shit fuck shit fuck shit fuck…”

Chapter 14 of EJ Spode‘s novel The Oddity.

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The Cheap Flat published 23/01/2017

‘Dear Landlords,

We need to not pay rent until our financial situation improves.’

By Catherine Madden.

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