:: Article

KAFKA Cosmetic onabotulinumtoxinFranz For Facial Rejuvenation

By Louise Phillips.

At a certain point, turning back becomes impossible. As nervous and forlorn as a child in the woods, your glory has greatly declined in recent years. The wicked and accursed bug of criticism bites down on your moderate to severe frown lines and nasolabial folds. At this moment, between the ages of 18 and 65, you must be conserving your strength to act – but doubts have invaded your waking moments and anxious dreams in a great tide of unrest. Unfortunately, there is little comfort to be had as you direct your gaze to the mirror.

Are you condemned to repeat the difficulties you are having carrying out your obligations? What do others know of the griefs that are in you, and what do you know of theirs? Is it not enough to let yourself make inquiries about why millions of women have tried KAFKA Cosmetic, if such questioning was even generally necessary?

Endlessly proven, year after year, KAFKA Cosmetic is a prescription medicine that is injected into muscles to smooth wrinkles and reverse the signs of aging. Logic is unshakeable, but it cannot withstand the desire of the brow to remain firm in line; the denouement can no longer be delayed – you have estimated all the chances, and are taking up the challenge with a smile – this is the point it is essential to reach.

Rejuvenation with KAFKA Cosmetic is quick, simple, non-surgical, and noiseless. It can also be used to enhance the features of a perverse and faceless bureaucrat, and adds fullness to pursed lips, authoritative-looking cheeks, and relationships which don’t come from the heart.

Important Safety Information

Read the Medication Guide for KAFKA Cosmetic before you start using it, and each time it is given to you. There is always new information in the Medication Guide. Not every week, but quite frequently. This new information should not take the place of consultation with an examining judge. Make sure you have read the new information in the Medication Guide before your consultation.

Tell an examining judge about all of the other medications you take, including prescription and non-prescription, and any other consultations or appointments you have scheduled in the upcoming months or years. Especially tell the examining judge if you are allergic to toxic substances. The examining judge is duty bound to investigate the matter; this procedure will have you looking instantly refreshed.

KAFKA Cosmetic may cause life-threatening side effects. How suddenly these side effects can overcome someone! If you had only behaved sensibly, nothing would have happened. Contact an examining judge or state attorney immediately if you have any of these problems after the injection of KAFKA Cosmetic:

Problems swallowing, breathing, unpropitious circumstances, dry mouth, descent into a state of worry and murky hopes, the complete loss of all faith that quiet is to be experienced anywhere on the surface of the earth.

Spread of Toxin Effects Throughout the Body:

A slight indisposition, blurred vision, dropping eyelids, an aversion to milk, others do not understand your words anymore, a conviction that the account of the chief matter is by the next day already false. Daily, you perceive things with less clarity. The world is transformed into a featureless wasteland.

Transformation into a Monstrous Verminous Bug:

The toxin may affect areas away from the injection site and cause serious symptoms, including the growth of a rock-hard exoskeleton, uncontrollable knife-like mandibles, and pitifully-thin arthropod legs. There has not been a confirmed serious case of transformation into a monstrous verminous bug when KAFKA Cosmetic has been used at the recommended dose to treat glabellar frown lines.

Your examining judge may change your dose of KAFKA Cosmetic. Your dose of KAFKA Cosmetic will change frequently as the examining judge attempts to determine the best dose for you. New doses of KAFKA Cosmetic must be effectuated under the supervision of a state attorney, and are contingent upon changes in the Medication Guide. These consultations should not occur on the same visit as the consultation over changes to the Medication Guide, which are not required to take place under the supervision of a state attorney. These subtle and strategically placed consultations will refresh cloudy facial features which have been veiled in mist.

Results may vary. Seven out of ten women have not scheduled their appointments with the examining judge and the state attorney to effectuate their new doses, due to changes in the Medication Guide.


ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Louise Phillips’ work has most recently appeared in Litro, Drunken Boat, Monkeybicycle, Pear Noir!, the delinquent, and McSweeneys.

First published in 3:AM Magazine: Monday, February 4th, 2013.