:: Article

Six Poems

By Audun Mortensen.


i saw mary-kate olsen riding a bike
across williamsburg bridge wearing ‘oversized blazer’
seemed like a ‘homage’ to annie hall



i was sitting on a bench in mccarren park last night
someone told me that lil wayne was in jail
seemed entertaining to scream ‘inside job’
seemed out of context though
wish i could play/understand baseball
in order to appreciate it more



in bed
mentally projecting 486″ x 486″ neon sign
of the face of the duane reade employee
who complimented my nasal spray
possibly due to its soothing aloe vera
just imagined a six feet tall nasal spray
standing in the whitney’s 5th floor permanent collection
and i’m standing in front of it
with a ‘hay fever grin’ on my face



at some point
last night
in a social setting
dominated by ‘loose males’
i tried to edit a poem
on my mobile
about ‘fever ray’
kept typing ‘hay fever’
and ‘loose males’

Four out of eight poems published online by Muumuu House (US), 2010. Written during residency in Brooklyn, NY, spring 2010.


Disaster Movie (2008)

Not another shallow Hollywood movie.
Better get off quick.
Al Gore was right.
Mother-@!#$@#^% Nature.
You’re favorite movies are going to be destroyed.
Rock on!
Destroying the summer… one movie at a time.
Prepare to die… laughing.


Son of the Mask (2005)

Who’s next?
The next generation of mischief.
The Power of Mischief.
Sequel to the #1 box-office hit.

Two poems from Mortensen’s poetry book SURF’S UP (2010) published by Trauma Wien (Austria), 2010. The book is composed of taglines for the ‘IMDb bottom 100 movies’ as voted by IMDb.com users.


Audun Mortensen is a Norwegian writer born in 1985. He is currently living in Berlin. Mortensen’s poetry collection Everyone Tells Me How Great I Am In Case I Turn Out To Be, was released by the Norwegian publisher Flamme Forlag in 2009. The book was voted “best poetry debut” by Aftenposten, Norway’s largest newspaper. His first novel entitled Roman was released August 18th, 2010 by Flamme Forlag.

First published in 3:AM Magazine: Sunday, August 22nd, 2010.