:: Article

the world would be happier with me dead in it

By Victoria Trott.

i feel sad
i like comfort so much

i keep seeing myself talking to my dad
about like, jesus or something
or being uncomfortable of mr. sheikh
and acting all civilised
to avoid discomfort

i won’t ever be able to do anything or realize life is meaningless
i’ll just be a bullshit person
like everyone who made me in my family
i’m gonna be a bullshit person
an asshole

i do not want this to happen
i already am an assshit bullhole

i can’t even use concrete images

blue flower
dyed industrially

that was not connected to anything
it was an image
a cliche image
i’m a bullhole cliche


victoria trott would rather be a mouse than a person. she likes to read books and eat raw almond butter with grapes until her stomach feels swollen.

First published in 3:AM Magazine: Friday, May 9th, 2008.