:: Article

Top Ten Tyres Ltd.

By Gareth Twose.

1.
89.14 % recurring of his life in phone queues
{understood as needed mathematical constant) listening
to voice analogue – that white Sprite caravan
jack-knifed |car dangling like participle – what kind
of haircut would save economy lopsided covering
half your face or feathered bob/ the soles of her feet
sunburnt because so much time upside down
in all-you-can-eat-data once most googled
there’s no real people any more: thinks Swabian hausfrau
after a conversion to storage solutions you may find
the cupboard is like an overhead luggage locker:
the years of Tupperware, unrivalled montage.

2.
Let’s see how the euro is performing. Do you want
to get the tram in off the line, where it’s gone
all Bombardier. And that’s just the low-hanging fruit.
Submit all doubts to nail-clippings analyst.
The virtual party was weakening against the yen,
one squeeze of lemon away from those brutal
cycle lanes. [Cf Upper Chorlton Rd.] Only DJs know
how tough it is whoring at Morrisons
sacrificing Nectar points. buttery biscuit base
was an algorhythm for the circumference of Superdry.
I wouldn’t want to knowingly understate
how uninterested I am. The conditions are close
to being met in most flecks of chilled parmesan foam.

3.
The way coffee bar chat slides into lacerating performance
assessment. One minute: omg that boy is so peng
it’s redonkulous. The next: the sads about targets
pegged to long term bruschetta and ab enhancers.
He had a cold frame to make, after residential care
got deleted. It’s all in the non-delivery:
drive with one hand, and one foot, and throw mail
out with the other. See where it lands, in a sprinkling
of liquid nitrogen. But first? bury the wreckage.
The rudbeckia coming out behind the obelisk, they
can fill a whole garden. Someone was asleep
on the job. Sockless, no tip.

4.
If this was a recovery, it was a bit Bobby’s/you could say
it was a values clash, as a doctor, learning your husband
is a trained killer. But off Tom went, into the sunset,
looking to instill more fear and discipline. We were left
to wrestle with roots non uprootable gnarliest how many
times. Violins and guitars hung up on wires.
Vats of glue blub blubbing. But keep it dark
like accordion-playing efficiency savings. His scrawl:
erotic redolence of exclusion unit called Turnaround.
The well-moisturized revolutionary always the
more effective. You need to be slippy.

5.
The little guy is going to get cremated. We knew this
once, but we’ve forgotten how to make an argument
that doesn’t involve swallowing polluted sea water
and a side order of Satan fries; Eer, I was with
a sick helium-filled sculpture of a desert island
who was taking a hit on her exposure to hot air.
If you hoover the indolent calligraphy, I’ll find out why
pickled scent of Lithuania is under speculative attack.
Voting against your own interests in a red lava dress
is not always miaow miaow. Changed Priorities Ahead.
How many abstract nouns could a girl date without
urine splashback? But the marmalade looked good.
That’ll be debts of two trillion. To go.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Gareth Twose is currently organiser of Writers’ Forum North, based in Manchester. He co-organised the recent Manchester Poets for Pussy Riot event. His work has recently appeared in SunFish, Depart, Litter and Assent. Gareth, who in 2005 completed a PhD on Early Modern Poetry, lives in Manchester and works as a teacher and union rep. He is a former journalist.

First published in 3:AM Magazine: Saturday, October 13th, 2012.