By Alan McCormick & Jonny Voss.
A jungle clears to a stinking crocodile-infested pool where an imposing man stands on a giant’s lotus leaf hypnotising a toad.
‘Imbibe from this horny toad my western ghost, and its blood will flood your skin,’ booms the ego that is Doctor Jones.
His pygmy assistant, Axel Rose, leads an ailing Missionary towards the radical, magical Doc.
‘I don’t think I can go any further, Master Axel,’ whispers the Missionary.
‘Shut the feck up you custard coward, and step your hush puppy soul on the crocodile path that leads to his enlightenment,’ growls the miniature assistant.
‘Axel, bring this pale shadow into my light,’ orders Doctor Jones.
A sharp spear into the back brings the Missionary down to Doctor Jones’s feet.
‘Stand up to me as a man and suck my toad’s juice,’ commands Doctor Jones.
The Missionary swallows and retches and swallows.
‘Monkey run, monkey talk, monkey done a bad, bad do do,’ chatters the Missionary. ‘Monkey chop sticks, monkey chops, monkey stink chops, monkey stick stinks, monkey done a bad, bad do do,’ he continues.
‘Monkey, what’s with the monkey all the time!’ shouts Doctor Jones. ‘Just spear the fool, Axel, I can’t take much more.’
‘Monky, munky, moonky, manky, minky, my monkey done a bad, bad do do . . .’ screeches the Missionary as he jumps like a chimpanzee into the centre of the pool.
ABOUT THE ARTISTS
Jonny Voss creates the pictures and Alan McCormick writes the words. Further McCormick & Voss collaborations can be found in Volume Magazine and on Dead Drunk Dublin, as well as on their website Scumsters.
