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Criteria for Rejection

By Rosie Sharp.

I. Parts Incompatible

We do not fit together;

your shoulder is inhospitable,

and our bodies refuse to align.

When we come together

your hipbones bruise the inside of my thighs

and I am always thinking.

II. Unexpected Shut-Down

There is no room for progress

when every time I make you smile

you overload and require maintenance.

III. Low Battery Life

I am too tired to finish

what I’ve begun

and you are not wired

to recharge me.

Do it yourself;

I am taking a shower

and will fall asleep facing away from you.

IV. Rational Disconnect

We wouldn’t have so many problems

if you could accept

that I am not programmed

to arrive at logical conclusions.

V. Total System Failure

The sound of you chewing

makes me want to destroy everything in the world

that has ever known what it is

to be happy.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Rosie Sharp started in California. She likes cookies and aquatic mammals. She does not like it when people tap on the glass.

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